I Can Figure It Out- Stepping Into The Unknown

In Episode 9 of The Business Mamas Podcast, I introduced a Framework for Enhanced Well-Being - Focus on Beliefs, Relationships & Making Heart-Guided Decisions. We have been having a conversation about how coming back to this framework of looking at our beliefs, our relationships, and our ability to make heart-guided decisions can lead us to enjoy feeling more present, both in our working hours and also in our lives outside of work.

Today, here and in Episode 14, I would like to dive deeper into a very important belief that I think is so worth spending your time and energy focusing on. This belief has played an incredibly important role in my life. It’s the belief that I can figure it out.

Stepping into the unknown can feel scary because we don't know what we don't know. If I allow my fear of the unknown to stop me, then I'll never step into new opportunities or really realize my potential.

Having the, “I can figure it out” mentality is an incredible feeling.

In January of 2017, I was an associate attorney working at a law firm. I was also a mother of a four-year-old and a nine-month-old baby. Although my husband, Jason, had been working his architecture business from home, Jason had taken on more of the childcare responsibilities with our little boys and we had primarily been financially supported by my salary. In January 2017, Jason and I made a big decision that we were going to start my own law firm. It was an exciting decision and it was also a scary decision because I knew that there were a lot of things that I didn't know about starting a law firm and that I was going to have to figure those things out. My husband, Jason, and I worked as a team, figuring out all the systems that we needed to make it happen.

Leaping into the unknown requires faith in yourself that you can figure it out.

How do you develop that faith?

One way that helps me develop the faith to make big decisions like that decision that we made in 2017 to start the law firm, is to face worst-case scenarios head-on. By facing the worst-case scenarios head-on, it allows you to step forward with the faith that you can figure it out even if things get difficult.

You can ask yourself these questions:

1) What if the business doesn't make money?

2) What if I'm miserable running a business?

Ask yourself any other scary worst-case scenario questions that you can think of. I asked myself these questions before starting my law firm.

The answer was that if the business doesn't make enough money, I can find a job working for someone else as an attorney. I know that I'm employable and I'm not going to let my babies go hungry. I'll find a job that can pay the bills if this doesn't work out.

If I’m miserable running a business, then I will make a change. I am not going to live my life being miserable in my work, so I will find something that's a better fit.

In reality, it's very unlikely that the business won't make any money. The more reasonable possibility is that the business would make money, but that it would be a smaller amount of money than what I was getting paid as an associate attorney, once you took into account all of the expenses that it requires to run a business. So, to mitigate those risks, we were cautious when taking on overhead expenses. We started off by hiring an outside service to answer the phones instead of starting off hiring a full-time employee. We started off by just renting one office in a building so that the rent cost was low. By being cautious with our expenditures, we needed less money coming in to be profitable. As the business grew, we made strategic investments in the business.

In addition to facing the worst-case scenario, the other thing that you can do is you can envision the best-case scenario. After you've confronted the ugly truth about the worst-case scenario, allow yourself the joy of getting to envision the best-case scenario.

This is the beautiful dream that is waiting for you to take action on it. Close your eyes, allow yourself to use all of your senses.

What does your office look like?

What does it sound like?

Is there a silence that allows you to have total concentration or is there a bustle of excitement?

This is your vision, so allow it to come into a clear picture.

Can you see all of the people who are comforted because you are supporting them? This is what you are going to be working for. The more you allow yourself to envision it, the easier it is to work towards it.

How to figure things out?

Research.

It's never been easier to learn how others have handled challenges in the past. Look on the internet. Google how to, or you can watch a YouTube video on how to do just about anything.

We live in an age where information is abundant and there are so many resources. You don't have to have all the answers now; you just have to take steps to look for the answers when you need them.

Also, reach out for help. Ask someone who's been where you are trying to go. Many people who have already been where you are now are flattered when they are approached for advice.

We like to be acknowledged and appreciated. When you acknowledge someone and ask for their advice, it's a compliment. Don't be afraid to ask for help.

Do your research though. Don't ask a person to guide you about something that you could have found through five minutes of internet searching on your own.

Be respectful of other people's time. Go to people after you've already taken some steps on your own to try to figure things out.

Develop a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset.

See yourself as a lifelong learner and not as someone who has value because of the knowledge you already have. If you value yourself based on the knowledge you already have, then you're going to feel like you always must have the answer. You'll feel like you're hiding your true self and at any point, someone could find you out. On the other hand, if you see yourself as a lifelong learner, you get to always be learning new things and there is no shame in not having the answer right now. You can and you will figure it out.

You don't know what you don't know. Prepare diligently and then trust you can figure it out.

As a trial lawyer, we prepare as well as we can before trial, and then we have to trust ourselves to adapt in the moment. Sometimes in a trial, new information that we were not anticipating emerges and we have to deal with it on the spot as best as we can.

Here are some tools you can use to practice this.

1) Ask yourself what is the worst-case scenario that could play out if I go for it? Then, address how you will respond if the worst-case scenario does become a reality.

2) Allow yourself to envision the best-case scenario in all of the glory and all of the details.

3) Move forward with the belief that you can figure it out.

Stepping into the unknown will still feel scary, but if you develop the empowering belief that you can figure it out, then that fear will not stop you.

Having the “I can figure it out” mentality is so incredibly freeing and I'm excited to see where it takes you.

If you enjoyed Episode 14 and this blog post, I would love it if you shared it with someone you think could benefit from it. I would also be incredibly grateful if you could leave an honest rating and review of The Business Mamas Podcast on Apple iTunes as that helps more people find the show and it helps me in sharing this message of practicing self-love and self-care with more people whose lives I know could be enriched by hearing it. Sign up to download my Morning Routine Guide and receive my bi-weekly newsletter at The Business Mamas Podcast. Until next time and with gratitude, Kara Stein-Conaway, @karasteinconaway on Instagram.