The Empowering Belief That You Can Focus On What You Can Control
In Episode 9 of The Business Mamas Podcast, I introduced a Framework for Enhanced Well-Being - Focus on Beliefs, Relationships & Making Heart-Guided Decisions. In Episode 10, we are focusing on beliefs and specifically, I want to address the important belief that you are capable of focusing on what you can control.
When you believe that you can focus on things that you can control, it unlocks so much and gives you freedom to really accomplish a great deal more than you otherwise would be able to.
The contrast to this empowering belief is focusing on the things that you cannot control and when you spend a lot of your energy focusing on the things that you cannot control, you miss out on incredible opportunities to actually change the things that are within your control.
In his book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey discusses three circles. The largest is the outer circle, which is referred to as The Circle of Concern and this includes things that can affect us but over which we have no control. Within that circle, there is what's referred to as The Circle of Influence, which includes the things that we do not control, but where we can provide influence. The smallest circle in the center is referred to as The Circle of Control. Things in our circle of control are the things that we can decide and that we can have complete dominion over.
When COVID-19 hit California in about March of 2020, I turned to leaders that I follow for guidance as a business owner. Michael Hyatt is one of the leaders that I looked to during this time. I saw that Michael Hyatt had created an online course that was called Leading Through Crisis. Although there were many valuable things that I took from that online course that helped me prepare myself for managing the challenges that I was facing as a business owner with the start of COVID-19, there was one central message that I took out of Michael Hyatt's Leading Through Crisis course that I want to share with you.
That one incredibly important lesson was that every day I have an opportunity to make an impact on the things that are within my circle of control. Every day I can ask myself, what can I do today that can move the needle on projects that I have control over?
It's been a little over a year now since I took the Leading Through Crisis course and since I've been more conscientiously practicing focusing on the things that I can control. Every day I feel deeply satisfied when I realize that I've taken action on the things that I can control and that I've not spent my precious energy worrying about the things that I just can't have any control over.
Believing that you have the ability to focus on the things that you can control, is incredibly empowering!
So, my call to action for you is that you do this:
When you find yourself worrying about anything, ask yourself, is this something I can control?
If it is something that you can control, then you can ask yourself, what step can I take right now that will move the needle in the direction I want to move to make progress on this?
If it's not something that you can control, is it something that you can impact or have an influence over?
If so, then you can ask yourself what steps can I take right now to make an impact I want to make on this?
If it's something that you cannot control and that you really can't even influence or impact, then the next question is, will you give yourself permission to release yourself from focusing on it?
If you oftentimes find yourself focusing on things that you cannot control, then you could benefit from trying out a new mantra. This mantra of “I focus on the things I can control” is the type of message that you can say to yourself first thing in the morning to bring yourself more peace and calm as you start your day. Having a morning routine is a really important part of my self-care practices. You can listen to Episode Two, My Break Down to a Breakthrough, where I go through my morning routine in detail if you need inspiration to create your own morning routine.
If you enjoyed Episode 10 and this blog post, I would love it if you shared it with someone you think could benefit from hearing it. I would also be incredibly grateful if you could leave an honest rating and review of this podcast on Apple iTunes as that helps more people find the show and it helps me in sharing this message of practicing self-love and self-care with more people whose lives I know could be enriched by hearing it.
Until next time and with gratitude,
Kara Stein-Conaway
